Imposter Syndrome – Do you feel like a fraud?
Have you ever felt like you don’t deserve your accomplishments? Individuals with Impostor Syndrome tend to suffer from a very specific self-esteem issue: The belief that they are unworthy of success. It consists of pervasive and consistent thoughts of inadequacy, even when you’ve proven yourself to be entirely capable.
It’s like you can’t convince yourself of how great you are, even when you really are!
An estimated 70% of people experience these impostor feelings at some point in their lives, according to an article published in the International Journal of Behavioral Science.
While there is no one cause of Impostor Syndrome, there are many factors that play into it. Some experts believe Imposter Syndrome has to do with personality traits, like anxiety, while others focus on family or behavioral causes. Sometimes childhood memories, such as feeling that you were never good enough, can leave a lasting impact in one’s life. People often internalize these ideas, that they must achieve or be perfect to be loved.
The primary qualities that those with Impostor Syndrome share are:
- The feeling of being a phony.
- Fear of being discovered as a fraud.
- An inability to accept success as genuine and not due to external factors.
The main types include:
- The Expert. This type believes they’re lacking in the knowledge necessary to be successful and spend a lot of time looking for new things to learn. They always seem to need to learn just one more thing, and then they’ll have the confidence they need to apply themselves.
- The Soloist. If you’re a soloist, you avoid asking for help. You feel that you must do everything on your own.
- The Genius. If you’re this type, you believe that anything that requires hard work is something you don’t do well. After all, an expert should be able to handle anything quickly and easily.
- The Perfectionist. The perfectionist is never happy, setting impossibly high standards and confirms the lack of expertise by failing to attain them.
- The Superhero. The superhero believes that he/she is incompetent when compared to colleagues and attempts to prove worth by trying to outdo everyone else.
Tips for moving past Impostor Syndrome:
Question your thoughts. To get past Impostor Syndrome, you need to start asking yourself some hard questions, such as: “What core beliefs do I hold about myself?” or “Must I be perfect for others to approve of me?” As you start to assess your abilities, question whether your thoughts are rational. Does it make sense that you are a fraud, given everything that you know?
Be mindful. Keep your mind in the present moment and notice your emotions and thoughts without judging them. This takes away the emotional charge. When you’re feeling anxious, try to relax and notice how you experience the anxiety in your body.
Give yourself credit. Change your self-talk. When you catch yourself becoming critical, congratulate yourself, instead. Reframing your thoughts will help you to view yourself in a more positive light.
Accept uncertainty. Impostor syndrome is often associated with perfectionism. Embrace yourself unconditionally, including your strengths and weaknesses. Set realistic goals and expectations.
Let go of trying to be perfect. Reframe your thoughts and engage in positive self-talk. Develop a habit of saying positive, encouraging things to yourself.
Stop comparing. Every time you compare yourself to others in a social situation, you will find some fault with yourself that fuels the feeling of not being good enough or not belonging. Instead, during conversations, focus on listening to what the other person is saying. Be genuinely interested in learning more.
Focus on solutions. When you’re faced with something that concerns you, look for a solution and implement it.
Share your feelings. Talk to other people about how you are feeling. These irrational beliefs tend to fester when they are hidden and not talked about. Having a strong support system and getting ongoing feedback that validates their efforts and outcomes is important for improving confidence levels.
Refuse to let it hold you back. Most people experience moments of doubt, and that’s normal. No matter how much you feel like you don’t belong, don’t let that stop you from moving forward in life. What’s important is not to let doubt control you and limit the courage to go after new opportunities.
Decide to be confident. When you start spiraling into self-doubt, force yourself to write down three things you’ve done well.
Accept compliments. Can you receive praise graciously or do you secretly want to run and hide? Practice saying thank you sincerely.
Remind yourself you’re good at what you do. Failing, losing and being wrong on occasion are all part of life. Don’t let it define you. Learn from your mistakes and move forward.
The Impostor phenomenon is an experience that tends to fly under the radar. Often the people affected don’t realize they could be living (and thinking/feeling) another way. If this might be holding you back, it is important to speak to a mental health professional. Overcoming Imposter Syndrome will help you to feel more comfortable with yourself and take more satisfaction in your achievements.
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